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You CAN Heal

In this stage of my journey, I have more good days than bad. In fact, I can gratefully say that my “bad days” are few and far between now.

But I remember when every day felt heavy and hard even as my nervous system buzzed–stuck in fight, flight or freeze. Sometimes I was certain I could feel the tingling in my spinal cord.

I remember when the moments filled with light or joy were few and far between after an extended absence of months or even years.

I remember texting a friend on the first day I woke up NOT feeling like I had been chased by a bear all night.

Recently, I opened a book that I have owned for a few years: “The Body Keeps the Score” by Bessel Van Der Kolk, MD.

I anticipate that many of the lessons in this book I have already been exposed to through study or personal experience.

And still, I am scared of this book. Scared to knowingly draw closer to the trauma that still lives in my body, even as I have done the work to heal so much.

A dear friend and I joke from time to time about my life’s purpose . . . like, really?! Trauma?! That’s my thing?? Couldn’t it be something (anything) else?

But as I read the literature and navigate my own journey, I have come to the conclusion that people who run themselves into the wall over and over and over again (like I did) are likely caught in a cycle that has been encoded in their brains and bodies by unhealed trauma and unprocessed emotions. And I care deeply about root cause solutions instead of bandaids.

Here is what I want you to know for today. And what I want my nervous system
to know too:

  • Ignoring our unresolved trauma makes us sick. Sometimes very, very sick.
  • You CAN heal.
  • You have already survived the worst part. I promise.
  • Healing happens in layers. In its own time.
  • When we are healing, our job is to support our bodies and minds as gently as we can, to the best of our ability, each day.
  • “The best of our ability” ebbs and flows. Rarely in a linear fashion. That is okay.
  • We can be afraid of healing and do the work anyway. I promise it will be worth it.

Sending you love and healing,

Booth