A radical idea in hustle culture.
As much as I love the gym, sometimes NOT going to the gym is the most restorative option for me. Particularly in times of high stress, when I can feel inflammation in my body, when my immune system may be working harder than usual (e.g., if I am surrounded by sick people), or when the pace of my schedule is intense.
This has been an area of development for me. There was a time when I relied so heavily on the gym as an outlet and anchor, that I actually wasn’t sure I could step away from my workout routine and maintain my health, particularly
my mental health.
I think it was just over a year ago that my nutrition coach suggested I take time off from the gym because my inflammation levels were out of control. And while part of me knew that my body was literally screaming at me, I was genuinely afraid of the potential repercussions. Could I stay well if I didn’t have the gym in my toolbox of stress management and grounding strategies?
I ended up staying out of the gym for a month or so. And I lived to tell the tale.
Over the last several years of working for myself, I have noticed that late Summer and Fall tend to be a particularly busy season for me. School schedules, speaking engagements, client work. There is just a different pace at this time of year.
I have been doing a lot of “behind the scenes” trauma healing and expansion work, too, which undoubtedly requires physical capacity as my body moves energy it has been holding for a very long time.
I have only been to the gym 1-2x per week over the last 6 weeks or so. And I had a light bulb moment after a text exchange with one of the owners the gym about the fact that we haven’t seen each other in a while.
As I have moved through this season, with all of the things on my plate and even a bout of COVID for someone in my house (not me), I realized . . . I chose to slow down BEFORE my body made me do it. Insert self-awarded gold stars here!!
What if we gave ourselves permission to rest and restore before our bodies made the choice for us?!
What if we didn’t wait until we were depleted beyond measure or ill (short-term or long-term) to rest?
What if we gave ourselves permission to rest early and often. Not just when we are hanging on by our fingernails or already falling from the sky with no parachute?
It’s a radical idea in hustle culture for sure.
Full transparency, my nervous system hasn’t yet fully caught up with the idea that I can rest or engage in recovery practices just because. #workinprogress And also, I know that the more I practice–just like building muscle–the more intuitive and easier it will be to choose rest (without tripping my alarm system in the process).
I can see my own evolution … from pushing my body and mind for THREE MORE YEARS after I started showing signs of mental and physical collapse …
To engaging in certain rest & recovery practices daily or almost daily; highly motivated by an acute awareness of what could happen if I don’t.
To learning to rest within weeks, days or even hours of noticing that my body is shifting toward inflammation and illness … and giving myself permission to rest and heal for as long as it actually takes (as opposed to expecting myself to bounce back immediately).
To actually slowing down BEFORE my body becomes ill or injured.
When we are “under water” so to speak, it is hard to remember what makes us feel better in a way that truly restores our energy and capacity. And it is really challenging to develop new habits when we are already maxed out.
Doing new things takes sustained energy. Which is hard to come by if our glass is already full or overflowing.
That is why I often coach people to make a list of the restorative practices that work for them so they can refer to it easily when they need it.
Restorative practices often aren’t the same thing as “coping strategies”. In my own experience, when I am “coping,” I am more likely to be numbing out, running from, or deferring the thing that feels overwhelming to me. I might do this by scrolling on my phone, working harder or longer, having a glass of wine or reaching for my favorite comfort food. We need coping strategies so please know I am not judging you!
I also happen to know these types of coping strategies are not going to help me complete the stress cycle or process built-up emotional or traumatic energy.
They will not bring me rest, restoration or even more peace.
They are not going to increase my resilience and allow me to face whatever the “hard” is from a space of more capacity.
In contrast, my go-to restorative strategies include: getting enough sleep, drinking water, fueling my body, moving my body gently through walks or stretching, spending time outside, spending time alone and/or moving more slowly through part or all of my day, daily meditation, and connecting with loved ones and furry friends.
How do you know that you are starting to reach your limits?
What are your go-to recovery practices?
Are there any new recovery practices you have been wanting to try?
Are you using your recovery practices before you need them?
What is one small shift you could make toward the idea of choosing rest and recovery before it becomes an emergency?
Share your reflections by replying to this email.
Love,
Booth
p.s. If gentle nudges and prompts supportive of your well-being would help you build your “recovery” muscles, my texting subscription, Phone Booth might be a great resource for your toolbox.
p.p.s. And speaking of REST and recovery, my next women’s retreat–for women entrepreneurs, leaders and visionaries–will be in beautiful Costa Rica, April 21-26, 2024! If you are interested in receiving a personal invitation to the Nourish Retreat, please reply to this email with the word RETREAT, and I will make sure you are on the list!